“Sarcastically Helpful Hardware Tips”
#1 Always yell across the store when you need help down an aisle. Especially when we are all busy helping other, more gracious, customers. We will drop everything we’re doing to help out the screamers.
#2 We love lingerers. The creepier you are, the faster the service. Always hang close around the register counter and key machine to guarantee immediate attention.
#3 The weekend do-it-yourselfers are our favorites. The less you know about your project, the better! Your project is our project in all sense of the phrase and we love helping EVERY step of the way.
#4 It’s always a great idea to throw a shopping list at us right when you come in the door. Don’t bother trying to look for anything yourself, let us do all your shopping for you regardless of your health or capabilities to walk a short distance!
#5 We are always very interested in the back story of your purchase. The more detail you put in, the more engaged we become. So please, don’t leave anything out. We really really want to know why you need to buy a particular item.
